a seattle bank teller was over the weekend because he decided to give the finger to bank policy and chase down the bad guy. apparently he launched himself over the counter, demanded to see the weapon, then when the would-be-robber ran he chased him down the block and nabbed him. the cops arrived soon after and took the idiot off the teller’s hands.
the previously mentioned bank policy is all about giving the robber what they want so they’ll leave. sure, it makes sense not to risk you neck for money that has more insurance than mississippi has trailer parks, but where is the pride, man? when a man tries to take what’s yours, you PWN the motherfucker. if he sticks a gun in your face, you grab it out of his filthy paw and beat him like a rented mule. this is america, goddammit.
so the poor bastard got fired. well, he did violate a strict policy. and he did kind of allude to the fact that he thoroughly enjoyed doing so. and he did seriously put everyone around him in danger. and he could have gotten himself killed. yeah yeah yeah. so what. he should get an award for it. maybe even the highly coveted Golden Ski Mask.
the only thing i’m left wondering is if he had some cool one-liner when he was throwing the guy down like a bag of dead puppies. i imagine him growling through clenched teeth (possibly with a cigar in them) something like: “consider your account closed”.